Friday, January 30, 2015

Bottle Of Bourbon Obscured By Religious Artifacts For Old-timey Effect

General Burnside and his whiskers peek between Sabbath candlesticks.
As I've noted previously, our family doesn't rank high on the old-timey scale. I don't hunt, plow, swim in a wool union suit, macrame owls, or play racquetball.

But we, as a family, collectively yearn for a simpler time, a time when...well, a time when stuff wasn't a bunch of plastic crap and a guy could get botulism from eating a pickle.

We have a glass-fronted cabinet where some of our religious items are kept. Adding to this sanctimony is the somber visage of the original Mr. Keep-Portland-Weird, Ambrose Burnside, staring at us from a booze label inspired by his daguerreotype.

We keep the bottle behind the candlesticks and next to the Passover plate as a first aid measure should religious observance in our home cause a calamity requiring a good, stiff drink.

I realize that Slivovitz should be the bottle in the cabinet, for that at least takes into account our Eastern-European ancestry. We'll have to pass on that until some hipsters in town start distilling the stuff and selling it with a cool old-timey graphic.







  

1 comment:

  1. Sue is married in order to Steven F. Humphries ALONG WITH features three children coming from sooner marriages. She was on the middle of any divorce with the 1980ís Whenever she started up writing her Kinsey Millhone books. She joking says, "Your homicidal urges can be turned in order to good in the particular world. Donít let The item ex-husband get a person down! simply labor and birth a new job." Sue Grafton's ' for Innocent'

    ReplyDelete